Photo: ELM
A WICKED NEW BASTARD is rising up from the southernmost depths of America and is unleashing old-school, battle-ax philosophies against an industry of idol pantywaists and the mainstream maggots.
Guitarist Marzi Montazeri, of Philip H. Anselmo and The Illegals, could very well be the second coming of the goddamned devil, or at bare minimum, that son of a bitch’s middle finger. This shred-bred Texan not only appears to thrive on the forefathers of his six-string witchcraft, but seems hell-bent and hard-liquor-driven on spawning a fiendish dimension of musical movements to serve as the purgatorial soundtrack for the coming apocalypse.
We recently caught up with Marzi at his home in Houston, Texas to talk to him about the band’s upcoming tour, his opinions of 1970s bush, as well as the groupies that hang around Phil’s infamous studio compound, known as Nodferatu’s Lair.
TSJ: You’re getting ready to embark on the first leg of the Philip H. Anselmo and The Illegals North American tour, which if I’m not mistaken, consists of about 15 shows beginning in Tulsa, Oklahoma. What have you been doing with yourself to get mentally and physically prepared to do a little rough housing with that guitar of yours?
Marzi Montazeri: Honestly, the day consists of so many different angles right now that it’s actually been difficult for me to find the time to fine-tune, so to speak. But over all, there are mental and physical aspects of my day that are pretty much consistent.
Most mornings, I get up as hard as the damn metal I play! After that, I feel like a walking tool, of sorts, with not much blood upstairs, like an aimless, hungry child yearning for the attention of flesh. But then a reality check, along with the infamous morning piss, and I get my day started right there in the bathroom where I keep a couple of dumbbells.
I immediately do anywhere from 30 to 50 curls and upper body crap, mainly to stretch. Weights are fun to stretch with — also dangerous if you ain’t careful, so watch it, kids! I do other types of stretches and push-ups, as well – [I have] a cup of joe, some Earl Grey, an emergency vitamin drink and, of course, I drink a lot of water through out the day.
I have a lot of isolation time, so my mind gears up and builds strength more often. I don’t allow many distractions though… I filter. I keep focused on what matters. My aim towards life and music, across the board, is much alike in that I simply AM, so I simply embrace the moments as they arrive. Doing anything with your body and getting the heart pumping has only resulted in positives for me. It’s a key element to life, and this coming from the King Procrastinator, nonetheless. [It] makes for absolute great sex as well.
Oh, and I play my ever loving wire and wood throughout the day with no particular set time, just whenever the call beckons — that is a given.
TSJ: That’s interesting because after watching a video of you playing at NAMM 2013, I thought – with a picking hand like that, this bastard ought to be pretty efficient with his masturbation techniques. Any tips for young whackers and shredders in training?
MM: Very well put, and yes, technique is a must, though I have to say that I pick with my right hand. Well, you know, if you wanna do anything right you gotta start off slow. [Because] even if it’s your ride – in the morning, it’s gotta warm up. A warm up is essential in all things in life really, ranging anywhere from cooking to any sporting activity. So when applied to a musician it’s no different, except that they are way more sexually driven – I have a friend who told me this.
A nice tip, I guess, would be to start very slow and get to know the reality of what is happening start to finish. Knowing that there are fireworks after the Astros’ games on Fridays doesn’t make them win games, so you gotta sit through it – it’s painful at times. So, in that case, you get a BBQ sammich and some Rocky Road ice cream and say [Hi] to a couple of Southern belles to kill the time, but you enjoy it in your own way.
Look, no offense, I know it’s like a popular sport, but most [of what] I know from it is that I dated Roger Clemens’s little sister – sweet gal. What I mean is that you know the end will come, so why not enjoy the ride. So you start slow, and with control, get yourself to heights were you look like a damn crocked left-handed baboon at the Houston Zoo…then the universe smiles. This goes for practicing the guitar, too.
TSJ: I imagine signing on as the guitar player for the legendary Philip H. Anselmo is a rather prestigious achievement and brother, after hearing a few of the tracks on “Walk Through Exits Only” and seeing some video footage of some of your past performances, I certainly believe [The Kid] (Philip H. Anselmo) picked the best man for the job. How exactly did this shredder’s wet dream come to pass?
MM: I can’t argue with the fact that you mention it being a dream of sorts come true really, but you know, not in a fictional/fantasy way, but more of a battle that had to not only be done, but won. Phil and I have known one another for many, many moons. I befriended Philip the same night as the rest of the boys in the mighty Pantera. Our friendship has lasted and has tested time, though we have endured hardships — none came from one of us towards the other. Philip is like a brother to me, and you care for your brother.
As far as jamming together, it started with Superjoint Ritual — he asked me to join and I did. Dark times laid ahead for the two of us, so the universe pulled us apart, but again, there was never friction between us. I stayed at a vacation home for six months called the Houston County Jail and was determined that upon my exit I would go full force with my music. At first, I blindly joined a touring band that was from Los Angeles — that’s all I will say about that. But right after, I got a big call from a successful artist that did both Rock and Hip Hop, and even though, being a musician, I thought of the possibilities, I couldn’t see myself tied in with that, regardless of the paycheck. So long story longer, I contacted Phil after a long gap. I believe my timing and his were finally right. He said, “Funny you should contact me now. I’ve got these four songs and want to finish them.” I don’t think, at the time, either one of us knew what was gonna happen, but deep inside, again, there were no doubts and we knew that certain boundaries were to be broken and rebuilt as a new standard.
There was just us two and whoever was available to come in and just jam the drums. We got our boy [Blue] (Joey Gonzalez), in the end, from the Fort Worth area to be at the helm of the rhythmcore, securing the drummer spot. We hammered away a few demos and then nailed the “War of the Gargantuas” EP, the full length [album] “Walk Through Exits Only” and material for another EP all at the same time.
Photo: Chris Trainer
I said throughout the three-year span of writing and recording that this was going to be a very important record, and for many different reasons, too. Musically and lyrically, it’s unlike anything else in its genre, though it holds true to itself. One important fact here is that all artists that have had the fame and fortune that only a few get, such as Phil himself, only get softer as the years go by and their disconnect from their audience, all the way to themselves, personally, is very evident. It’s a comfortable state of being the shit, but not happy because [you’re] just rehashing [your] own shit. It takes more than what I can put into words to have the courage to push forward – and in this world too, to boot.
But it’s answering a call that beckons you to listen that comes from such depth within that again, proper use of words will still not justify it’s immense beauty and power. That is the only type of commitment I feel strongly about, like the relationship you have with yourself.
There were obstacles as there are with any project, but this time we moved forward, laying any doubt to rest. To have or even say that [you] would like to have that sort of an attitude, where you are numb to anything worthless of your time is one thing, but having the clarity to push forward, no matter the storm, is another. We weathered all that came our way throughout these years to keep focus and deliver a pressure cooker of material in the end.
Philip H. Anselmo & The Illegals: “Bedridden”
TSJ: Okay, obviously this band doesn’t operate like much of the pop music downtrodden in which band members fly into town on private jets, rehearse for a few hours, have a $500 dinner and then fly half way across the globe to host the latest teen awards show. Tell me a little bit about what your rehearsal schedule has been like with Philip H. Anselmo and the Illegals — has Anselmo been working you guys like a bunch of borrowed mules, or what?
MM: Is that what those mothertruckers do? Well, I’ll be a monkey’s step uncle — I had no idea. But seriously, fuck those fake assholes. To say it best, I will quote the back of a Housecore shirt where it explains [us] as a whole, and that is, “We are classic, not classy.” Rehearsals with Philip and the band take place at [The Lair] in Louisiana, but prior to getting there we, The Illegals, get together in [The Dark Room] (with one fan in it) in Porter, Texas. That’s to give you a picture of what it looks and feels like in there – no light and hot as the hell God created in Texas and called Houston weather. That’s where I pushed for The Illegals to get together and hammer out the set, to fine tune it, before taking it back to The Kid.
When we show up already bringing something to the table, then Philip’s job gets a bit easier. We then go in auto pilot — kill mode. That’s a magic that, as for now, has only has been shared with the band members, and that is what we are bringing to you on tour. We are most definitely a live band and our very first tour will be historic.
TSJ: What does the band do to unwind after being cooped up in “Nodferatu’s Lair,” all day?
MM: Eat. That is if Philip doesn’t kidnap you on the way to the kitchen to let you listen to some killer music. I’ve been there, stomach-a-growling and all, smelling the delicious food that the most awesome Metal Queen, Kate Richardson, has cooked but you know, you don’t wanna let The Kid down — he is a true Lifer.
The fuel, though, is what we are after at first. You know, when you work your ass off to a point where you’re putting Liquid Skin on yourself after every song to cover up gaps before the blood flows out [of] your fingertips, grub ain’t on your mind. But boy, as soon as the final battle blows come down and the lights go out at The Lair, refueling is certainly top priority.
If any of us are to be standing after the meal we do one of two things – either we watch a horror flick or have a listening party of different sorts of music, but one by one we fall out. Our schedule is set and very demanding, so you need good rest.
TSJ: All right, let’s get down to brass tacks — how much pussy have you been getting as the result of playing guitar for Philip Anselmo?
MM: I could use some brass tacks, really! In all honest, the results have been the pussy cats at Phil’s crib, which I only see one, but I’m pretty sure that Rusty is a boy cat – the back room sure smells like it.
TSJ How old were you the first time you looked at a Playboy magazine? And do you prefer the 1970s bush of yesteryear, or do you subscribe to the clean-shaven, sleek and chic look of today?
MM: Oh, man, I was quite young, I know that. And it was the [older] guys in the hood that had an issue with Suzanne Somers in it — for the time that was a big deal. Since I was the youngest, and everyone else had seen it, I was targeted for a reaction upon the first viewing. It was the backyard of a friend’s house and ta-da – they brought it out like it was gold.
They rushed through the pages and showed it to me. She was naked under a waterfall like she was just hanging out — not too sexy, really. Honestly, for the time and my age, I didn’t think it was that special. I thought it was pretty weird to see her naked cause my mother liked her a lot, and I thought about what she would have thought, you know… an innocent young man I was. And my friend’s reactions were too high-strung — I could even tell that at a young age. Good for me to see and [to] not want to be like [them]. That attitude helped me win anything and anyone I ever desired.
When we speak of the infamous bush — two things pop straight in my head and both, I guess, after all these years, you could say have scarred me. First, one of my first visits to a public pool in Houston — here comes a young lady with a nice [fro] poofing out both sides of her bikini bottom. Honestly, I wanted to start running.
Second, was a terrifying spread in some mag that again, the older bastards showed me because it was fuckin’ outrageous, still to this day, and they wanted to see me scream, I think. Take your hairiest Middle-Eastern man and add a girl’s face and vagina to it, and that’s what it looked like. So, fuck no, I am not a fan, unless it’s a cute l’il Mohawk or something like that. But no damn bush.
TSJ: If the powers of mixology and bar sciences were to invent an alcoholic beverage called “Montazeri’s Revenge” – what would this hellish concoction consist of?
MM: A shot of silver tequila with a dash of lime — and brother, I believe you just titled my favorite drink, so cheers.
TSJ: How many more women would you say you’ve slept with because of Rock N’ Roll than if you would have become a janitor or a florist?
MM: I believe the count would have been the same regardless of my occupation, though it may have been higher if I were a florist. Most of my lady friends never knew that I actually played an instrument until later.
I’ve never been the one to brag about anything that I did, personally.
If a girl’s gonna like you, she’s gonna like you regardless, and if anything, rock n’ roll has taught me who to stay away from. I don’t like the typical girl, no matter what race, color or creed. You gotta pack some kinda of a special punch, kick, mojo or spice to get my attention.
TSJ: What would you say was the first record you heard that made you consider selling your soul to become a Guitar God?
MM: The answer to that would have to be Van Halen’s debut album. The beauty of most things that are memorable, are the first experiences in anything that we do – like your first kiss. Just as important, if not more for me, was the first time I heard Van Halen. It was like a long lost friend that I knew I had, but didn’t remember till I heard a guitar fly over me like a jet airplane. The rush that I got from Van Halen still flows in me today.
Photo: Chris Trainer
TSJ: What kind of food and drink is on The Illegals’ tour rider?
MM: Well, there are plenty of liquids — plenty of sips, and we all have preferences, you know, so there is a variety. I stay away from sugar and bad carbs like bleached bread, regular sodas and things of that sort. I do love colas, so I get the kind made with stevia — it’s a natural plant and won’t kill you like the chemicals that the rest use. Organic fruits and vegetables are a must. Yogurt and fresh juices, too. We all eat well, and most of us are good cooks, so we all can bring something to the table — literally. Blue is the best at eating though. On our days off, we will BBQ — that’s a given.
TSJ: Outside of The Illegals, what are you working on that we can expect to see come to fruition in the near future?
MM: That is a great question. You see with Philip, I can do what I simply cannot in any other projects because there is no other front man that delivers what he is delivering, especially at this time, making it very unique and special for me. This level of extremity is what I’ve longed for to medicate myself – so it is a must in my life. This is where my battles have brought me. With Philip, the straitjacket is off.
Now, as a soul having a human experience, I have my own ideas of sounds and vision. I fronted a three-piece Southern Metal band called ‘Heavy As Texas’ where I wrote every damn lick and lyric with no outside help at all. I am absolutely doing a record with it when time allows. I’ve already got 20 tracks for it. It is a simple listen with a very southern feel, and not too over the top.
I’ve got tons of movie scores and film ideas that I’d like to see have some light when the time is right. I love acting, writing and directing. Producing in the studio is also a great passion, both for my projects and others. Hopefully, I will be able to exercise what I know and help others achieve their goals. Again, at the right time and place.
For now, my solo record is in the near future. I’m actually way excited about it due to the collaborations I will be having with different artists, ranging from all sorts of different backgrounds musically. This way I can do what I do, which is whatever the fuck I want. It could be so heavy that you could actually feel like an earthquake below you, or so soft that you slip into a peaceful, hypnotic state.
I love music and film as a whole. As a person, there are so many highs and lows I’ve felt, like any other, but it’s my job to properly interpret my vision and music.
My goal is to constantly kill whatever ego I have left daily, and dive into a realm of learning and writing to better myself in general — to know more, you know? I owe it to myself.
I look forward to this particular project because the list of artists that I have acquired for it is simply mind blowing. It will be nothing short of a series of challenges and self-discovery; though I know it will be rewarding in the end -having had the experience to have shared and brought to life music with who I consider some of the greatest talents to walk the earth.
“Walk Through Exits Only,” the new album from Philip H. Anselmo and The Illegals was released July 16, and the band kicked off its North American tour July 31.
Follow Marzi Montazeri on Twitter @marziarmy